COGNITIVE HEALING
by Alan Ewing, BA (Hons), MSc, Cert HE
The idea behind this Cognitive Healing is to analyse cognitive behaviour within oneself in relation to the past. To gather an understanding about thoughts and feeling about past events from broken relationships. and to be aware of how this affects the present.Spiritual context is also included.
Psychological and Emotion Issues
Mood can be positive and then affected by triggers that recall past relationships. Awareness of this is keeping hold of the present and so retaining focus of life as it now stands.
Environment plays a huge part in creating a trigger. The return to a place that holds deep and significant memories of key life events. This can have deep emotional response. A yearning for the past giving rise to sadness can then predominate. In this, the more negative experiences of the past are reshaped by memory. A golden memory is selective in that it paints out the reality of day to day living. Although by the same token a negative though process can wipe out all of the good parts. Memory is often selective in this choosing of one or the other. It is balance that needs to be found in all of this.
Negativity can often be found in thoughts about what happened in the past regarding emotional relationship betrayal, legal attacks and the resulting consequences. It is difficult to deal with this. The thoughts are circular in nature on have the same resultant effect upon the emotions. These being anger, frustration and a sense of injustice.
Solutions to the above have to lie in acceptance of what is. The thoughts and emotions are present ones. Certainly, it is a case of dealing with these day to day difficulties, while grasping hold of the more positive, creative zones that come along. Focusing the mind into moving on being key to this.
There are days when reflection, meditation and a sense of here and now take place. This produces lucid thought patterns which enable emotional peace. Acceptance of all that has happened takes place. This is not a cure all, rather it is like finding oasis of shelter within the storm of life. It is a place to contemplate existence and realise that all passes. Emotions, thoughts are temporary and the state of being
The moving on process and healing of both emotional and psychological wounds takes time. It is to be found by moving back into a sense of wider being. This may be particularly true after an intense relationship. A dependence may be formed on another person. In a toxic relationship this can inflict great harm. The only cure is to completely withdraw from such a situation. It is also important not to rebound into a quick fix substitute relationship. The danger lies that if healing has not fully taken place then the toxicity could be projected on to an innocent third party this bringing hurt into their life too.
Spiritual Insight Of The Way
Solutions to negativity about the past have to lie in acceptance of what is. The thoughts and emotions are present ones, and lie within present solution . Certainly, it is a case of dealing with these day to day difficulties, while grasping hold of the more positive, creative zones that come along, allowing new people and new influences into your life. Focusing the mind into moving on being key to this. To grasp what is new being all. To shed your skin and become here and now. To be born again.
Ultimately, to move on from hurt, has to involve new forces within your life. Input has to come from new interpretation of oneself as a person. These are the healing angels. The ones who come along and and see you as new. See you in the present, and not as the delusion of the past that you hold yourself within. In this, you walk on and find your new self." -
The road to The Cross is not an easy matter to contemplate. Particularly in this self-ego age. "I AM" tends to be what we think of ourselves as. Eternal. Each day we awake taking it for granted that we live on. The age of technology has heightened this sense of all-being in a human concept. Humankind has made a God in its own image. No need for a Supreme Being when it is already here. And yet The Bible says that this will happen. That all trace of our connection to The Creator will be disowned. Human arrogance will assume that all belongs to it. The twist being that there is a dark mind in all of us that seeks this. The Cross was an anti-dote. A way of saying "I AM" means loving each other.
Conclusions
The next step that you take is one of trust. Within yourself and within the source of all life. Free-will exists in this. To step backwards would be the worst error imaginable. A brave step is always best. To dwell on what has passed is indeed to waste the present moment. For to do so would be to deny the angels at your doorstep who want you to live on. To listen to them is to know your true self.
To let go of the past is all. Evaluation of it, while remembering loved ones is key. Though you cannot live in it. Life, by nature, proceeds. Within your footsteps the loved ones will walk. In this, you will find new loved ones. Cherishment of life is all. God gave us our Being and we must always appreciate that. Who knows how long that we walk on for? Only God. We are like mist on the hills that comes and goes, as the New Testament teaches us. So every moment must be savored, and that is what our loved ones would expect.
Facing a nemesis is the biggest challenge that one can ever face. Every thought that you have, every emotion, is known in advance. All that you express can be turned back upon you. Sherlock Holmes faced Moriatary with the only way to go over the cliff with him to get rid of him. Though it might be a "her". You can never confront your nemesis for you would simply be digging two graves.
Epilogue
Embeds of the past live in the present, both in cognitive and emotional form. Acceptance of this has to take place to find peace. The answers to this lie not in stepping back into the past, rather to find the solutions in the here and now. The mind can become ingrained in habitual thinking and it important to teach it new habits. This can take time and a great deal of patience is required.
Projection by another on to us can also hold dangers. This can be an issue in their past life that was not resolved. The slightest trigger can revive these issues and the transference of the past on to the present begins. We can also find ourselves doing this, whereby a new person in life takes the blame for something a previous person did. This emphasises again the need for total resolvement of past issues in relationships so as to give a fresh page to new doors that may open in life.
Being forlorn and dwelling on the past can seem negative. Certainly there is a danger of wallowing and this can wipe out present potential. The importance of keeping the mind occupied can counter this. Such reflections can then be treated as melancholic, and naturally episodic. Avoidance of a deeper depression needs to be checked by witnessing this condition as within the present rather than lapsing into a state of actually living in the past.
The conclusions of this Log can now be formulated. The equation is in words: Where am I? = Where I am!
This being the present moment. The past is thought contained in memory, as indeed any projection of the future is cognitive imagination. The only reality that actually exists is the present, with both past and potential future residing within it. Our identity forms as a result of birth, relationships with family, friends and within intimate encounters.
It therefore follows that identity is continually changing. It is in fluxus quo. Life circumstances and interpretation of ourselves by others causes this continual change. Hence we can only know who we truly are in the present moment of time. This is constant renewal.
Often, our very soul itself is disturbed by estrangement from others. Our nature is to love ... when rejected we feel hurt and can lash out at others. This is all part of God/Being. In facing conflict, we need to see the other person. Try to bring it 50/50. In that way ... friendship can grow ...
